IRL EXP: I Hit a Deer and It Was 'K.

Exhaustion takes it's toll on people in different ways. Many feel sluggish and worn down. Others feel like they just hit "E" on their energy and need to rest there and now. Me? A cop could have pulled me over, gave me a breathalyzer and hesitantly let me go; I was riding those last bits of energy and bouncing off the walls.

My daughter had just finished her first dance recital (I'm so proud... *sniff*) and I had to pack up. Just because everyone else goes home didn't mean I could. So after an additional twenty minutes, everything is ready to go; dancing equipment, dance floor, and my dancing coworkers.

But just because I'm buzzing like a bee doesn't mean I'm not paying attention. Not even five miles from the recital, a doe (A deer, a Female deer.) decides to walk onto the road. I see this deer and slow down. I mean, she's a good 40 or so feet away. I see the vehicle behind me is at a safe distance. I look at my dashboard and we're at 30 mph. She's still walking in front of me. Don't you see the really bright lights coming at you? Look to your right, you ridiculous hunk of meat! LOOK RIGHT!

At ten miles per hour, I slap a deer with the front of my 2007 Chrysler SUV. I watched in awe as the doe rolled over, stood back up, and limped quickly into the bushes. Well, time to call the police.

Weird thing here. I had thought that if you hit a deer, the call center send an officer to you for a report. Turns out I may be wrong or gullible. The lady on the other end said the nearest officer was thirty minutes away. If I wished and if there was no damage, I could just not file a report. You know, despite the fact that I may have just doomed a living creature to a slow, painful death.

Taking a look at the front of my vehicle, all I had was hair. Deer fur everywhere. No blood, no cracks, no dents. So I took the nice lady's advice and drove home.

Now thinking about it, I should have just sat there and waited. I feel a little guilty for not doing so, especially since I'm, like, Lawful Stupid at most points of my life. Chances are my insurance company is fine with my decision, since they really don't like me right now. Or ever. But those events are different stories for a different time.

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