IRL EXP: Giving Headaches

I had most of this typed up, AND THEN MY APP HAD TO BE A LITTLE BITCH AND ERASE ALL MY NEW STUFF WHEN I QUICKLY SWITCHED SCREENS. ARGH!DBSABGHSJDKI32WDHFNRJEK4IWEDVGFER4W3Q89WQS0DCVBG

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This concept of IRL EXP posts used to revolve around VG concepts, and I've lost sight of that for a while. So let's start over. (Restart?)

In Life, you start out with just you and your family. As you get older, your acquaintances become larger. Once you have established a regular "Party", you stroll though Life with these people, changing out as needed.

Not the same thing when you create your own Family. You own these minions for the next 18+ years, and They Own You right back. Which works fine for me, as I enact my Master Plan to create a tiny Army of Gamers!

Ellie was hooked early, watching Dad play some Halo and Assassin's Creed. Autumn followed suit watching me play League of Legends. Both play Minecraft, Splatoon, and Pokemon now. They even like Pokemon cards, which I can use to teach them about Magic: The Gathering. (Thief and Barbarian Joined!)

Emerson has mobile games on lock. He loves the "Where's My Water" series, and has expressed interest in Pokemon, along with actual Physical Sports. 50/50 deal, I'll take it. (Fighter has Joined!)

Nicole, my beautiful wife, hates Video Games. Well, not really. She has a purist taste when it comes to Gaming. Zelda series, Mario Party, and nearly any Health/Fitness game. That last one "doesn't count", as it helps her, and mine "keep me on my lazy butt". Oh, if only you knew. (Cleric has Joined!)

What of the baby? Well, DUH. Let the poor dude learn to walk first. Can't go messing with his fine motor skills if they haven't developed yet, you know? However, I have seen that, like a certain Auntie of his, he has a knack for Music... (A Bard Approaches?!)

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"Cory feels Homesick."

I do not.

"Cory thinks about Home."

Fuck off.

"Cory is thi-"

AAAARRRRRAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Whenever I'm home, my little demons run around the house for one reason or another. Nicole needs my help with chores, children, cleaning, or caring for herself. (She tries too hard, breaking/tiring herself out, and I nurse her back to health. Mainly because she thinks she can handle it herself.) So whenever I travel, I take the blessing of Silence and treasure it like the beautiful gem it is. (1-Player Game)

After a while, that gem is hard to deal with. The silence becomes deafening, to where I talk to myself to maintain sanity. (Oxymoron, Am I right? Probably not.) I see children cry and complain to their parental units, and I become jealous. I see a couple walk by, holding hands, and become sad to be away from my Lovie.

This day and age, I'm glad for Video Calls, but some days, even those just don't help. I've grown so use to the constant chaos that is my life. When I'm away, I feel Lonely. I just need to hug my kids. Have them depend on me for just a bit longer. I need to wash dishes, just to make things easier for my wife, who just had a bad day at work. Some days, I can't be there for them, and it slowly kills me inside.

Don't ever tell them that. As much as I miss everyone, I still have to make money. Them knowing would just make leaving harder. (You Earned 400 Gp! You became Homesick.) And Fuck these Earthbound references! That game messed with me, dude.

IRL EXP: Echoing Footsteps

I awake from this coma of inactivity to catch up with a gigantic post! That will later be my undoing! Whatever!

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The Great Eternal Nap may bother me, but my place in this world doesn't. I love this ball of dirt we walk on. I love the green trees that surround my home. I adore the very fact that Mother Nature is right outside my door.

So it really bugs me when people, in general, treat this planet horribly. Strip mining, deforestation, acid rain, extinction... It's disgusting how we treat Earth. I am by no means an environmentalist, but I understand the importance of maintaining a clean house. So to those who are OCD about a clean living or working environment, please help the planet. For those who cannot or will not clean to safe their lives: You literally are killing yourselves slowly by not cleaning.

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Flaws. You have them. I have them. Everything has something about them that would make it LESS than perfect. And that's okay.

I have one imperfection I'd like to address right now. My ability to make people happy.

"But that's not-" Yes, it is. "No, it's-" I'm telling you, it is. "You keep interrupt-" Moo.

My want to see people smile is a gift and a curse. What if people don't want to smile right now? What if I have to compromise myself or others to steal a grin from someone? I just want people to like me- to like everybody else in the world. To accomplish my goal, sometimes I have to do things I don't want to. So by making one person smile, I have several people scowling, creating more work for me.

It's something I want to work on. Through our flaws, we realize the kind of people we are. By accepting the fact that we are flawed, we can control them and/or find a way to minimize them. You shouldn't get rid of your faults, as they define who you are; they make you this person right now. Also, by ridding yourself of these quirks puts yourself at risk for acquiring new flaws.

We are not perfect. That's okay. If we were, what would be the point of friendship, or marriage? Sports? Politics?

You don't have to like your flaws. Just be aware that everyone, including yourself, has something less than perfect about them.

IRL EXP: Cars Don't Like Me; They Really, REALLY Don't Like Me

How many vehicular accidents can you say you outlived? Hopefully, a wise person said, "All of them," unless I have undead in the audience. Moving on; I have experienced nearly one really bad vehicular accident since I started driving. My insurance premiums should be horrible, were it not for the fact that most weren't my fault and the cars were totaled every time.

Cars, Cars, Cars... This blogging thing everyday is hard.

I guess it's not because I'm a bad driver; if anything, these accidents have made me a Cautious person. (Ha Ha! Faked you out!) I make sure to leave early, check the weather, take the main roads to avoid getting lost or stuck, plan for contingencies that only exist in my head, have a weapon nearby for car jackers, pack my emergency kit full of bandages...

You could call me a coward, but the difference is a coward doesn't do anything out of fear. I just plan until I don't feel afraid anymore. No one's gonna jack my car- but what about wild animals...

I'll mess a Doe up, but what if a Puma jumps my car? Or a Bear, or a Moose? An angry pack of Squirrels?

And now I'm back to planning- I should study local Rodent Gang Signs.

IRL EXP: Beauty is the Eye of a Needle

Like, what the hell people? What is with the concept of Beauty nowadays?

I have a thigh gap. My waist is the same size as an A7 piece of paper. I wear a full-body suit at the beach to stay pale.

Fuck you, you shallow pieces of wasted potential. People like you are brainwashed by media moguls for their fun and profit. By obeying the Neon God, you corrupt young minds, making them think they aren't good enough for scociety.

What's my vision of beauty? My wife, obviously, but not for the standard reasons. Hell yeah, I like the way she looks on a normal basis, but there are moments where she drives me wild. Moments were she's tired of kids and coworkers, where she's exhausted of dealing with the outside world, and fuck everything so I don't care what's for dinner. Where I can see pure fire in her eyes, from curiosity or anger, I doesn't matter; that moment is beautiful.

"But Cory," no one actually said but I pretend for narrative's sake, "What if they see their own suffering as Beautiful? Aren't you just being a dick by comparing your version of Beauty to everyone else's and demonizing those who disagree with you?"

I... Um... Hmm... Shut up. Your face is dumb.

I'd argue more, but I need to publish this damn thing before Midnight CST.

IRL EXP: Death is My Ending, and Your Beginning

The biggest fear I have is Death. Dying is fine; I understand that when I get older or hurt, I'm one step closer to the end. Should there be any kind of a Great Beyond, I will be okay. I'm worried about the possibility of there not being a Heaven or Hell. No Purgatory, no Valhalla, no Blessed Isles in the middle of the Underworld for Heroes. What would that be like?

Every time someone casually mentions death, I get a wave of terror over my entire body. I have to distract myself to keep me mentally in check. Concentrating on the subject leads my mind to dark places, literally: each brush with the Grim Reaper has left me unconscious for a good amount of time. This makes me wonder. What if that's all there is? Black, Nothingness, an empty Void of Darkness. It bothers me to the point of tears.

I'm not ready to call it quits just yet. There's so much going on in this world that I want to witness. All the advancement in Health and Technology, the Stories and Games being told, the challenges and obstacles being overcome and endured; most of all, I just want to know what happens after I die. An epilogue to this beautiful story I have created.

IRL EXP: Alive, for a Limited Time only!

Who am I? Where am I? How did I get here? (As our days go by~)

A friend of mine (If this is you reading, What's Good?) has been doing National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) for years. However, the creative tendencies that month starts are hard to put down, so he found more National 'Blank' Months to participate in. This past March was National Art Drawing Month (NaArtDraMo), and I wanted to join him for the next Na-something-Mo.

National Blog Writing Month (Na-Whatever-Mo) is for April, Which brings me back to this fossil. It's not that I don't like this blog, but I feel like I don't have the time to write in this every week, let alone every day. I have made the commitment to my friend, despite my time-management failures, because: A) He is a dear friend of mine, and B) I would like to do NaNoWriMo as well, and this could bring me closer confidence-wise to participating.

This month has additional conditions to it. First, Sundays are days-off (Groovy). Second, The blog posts must follow the simple theme of the Alphabet: A-Z topics: with A being Day One, B for Day Two, etc. Today's post is about April making this Blog "Alive" again. This thing comes back to life more times than Horror Movie Villians.

What will the rest of the posts be about? I don't know, honestly. Come back tomorrow and we'll find out together.

Still Not Dead Pt. 3: I have no BRAAAAAIIIINNNSSSS

Things got busy.

"How so?", I pretend you saying to your computer screen.

Well...

I stopped doing Truancy reports for my school. It was draining my free time, time spent with family AND my sleep time. Throw on a report that makes people look bad, and Drama Ensues. Check please, thank you and I've never felt better.

I switched to Pokémon Y. No Nuzlockes, I just want to play for fun. I am having fun, sorta. Need to figure out my team comp for my first Elite 4 run, but that's it.

My son is waking up in the night multiple times. Why, I don't know, but he does. My only qualm with him so far, other than him puking all over my face the other day. I'm still too upset with myself to explain it.

I am in charge of a dance class, a policy council, a fantasy football pick'em league, and am learning to budget my time much more than before. I still don't have enough time for myself, but I get more time for family, so it's all good.

College sux. That is all.

League of Legends is approaching Season 4, and I STILL haven't entered Ranked yet. Oh well, Season 4 will probably reset the boards, so I'll try then. MAYBE.

I am playing Magic:The Gathering. I use old and new Slivers, so I'm having fun watching people's faces as I use old cards and wreck decks. Still not a perfect deck, and no-where near Standard... Yet. When WotC prints a new Queen, then we'll talk money.

And that's all I'm sharing today. Cheers.

Nuzlocke 13: A Spider with Six Legs?

A quick post, since I just noticed my last post never went up properly when it should have. This really happened in game, and it's moments like this that make Nuzlockes totally worth it.

IRL EXP: My Gaming Family

This little blog is based on a quick thought I had.

If I were to divide my family into character classes, this is what we would be.

Me: I would class myself as a thief. I like to bounce around, climb walls, while I. shoot and stab things. If you doubt my skills, then check me out bouncing around my children as they run around trying to avoid me. The stabbing comes from my love of sharp objects. Shooting comes from my love of arcade games like "Time Crisis" and "House of the Dead".

Nicole: If we were to go with the 4th Edition D&D, Warlord. Easy. If we were traditionalist, we would go with Wizard. She gets things done.

Ellie: She's a cleric, since she cares so much about family. Well, that and band-aids. We go through a box a month because of her alone.

Autumn: Barbarian. 'Nuf said.

Emerson: The tank of the family, a Fighter. You should see his little baby muscles.

Looking at this, I have a fairly standard adventuring party. Cool.

IRL EXP: New Game+

My wife has noticed that I have been depressed as of late. I have felt it, yet don't know why I feel like that.

I just came back from a graduation party (Go Marty!) where we had a conversation about youth today. So much potential, so much ability, and yet no drive to do anything. After High School, they just get a job and stay there.

Maybe that's what I lack. Drive. A new quest to embark on. It may be a tad bit harder to start a new quest, since I have a family to take care of. The military kinda puts a kibosh on most things I can do as well. So what can I do to give myself drive, while keeping my obligations to my family and country?

Hmmm. No wonder I'm depressed.

IRL EXP: The Tables Have Turned

Rewind to a younger time. 1990's or so seems good.

I'm the oldest sibling out of six children. (Oldest brother and at number 3 out of 12 if I include my "Adopted" family) So naturally, I'm used to my younger siblings wearing my clothes or playing with my old toys; the "hand-me-downs" of a family. I would, in turn, be the guinea pig of the bunch when new stuff came around. If it worked and outlived me, it gets passed down the line. If it didn't work, then the younger kids get a swing.

Fast-forward a few years to today.

I go visit my loving younger brother (2 out of six, and 5 out of 12) and visit with him. I feel bad, because he gives me stuff I can't buy: A computer he isn't using, a DS and a few games, spare change to get this really cool game that he owned once. Just today, we talked about Pokémon Gen VI and how I needed to buy a 3DS just to play it. My brother looks at me and says, "I can give you my 3DS to use; After I buy the 3DS XL, that is." I shouted a profanity at him and a thank you immediately afterwards.

Then we realize: His computer, his old DS, and now his 3DS... I, the eldest, have now started receiving hand-me-downs! He smiles in delight as I ponder these newfound feelings. Not very good feelings, by the way. I asked if this is how it feels to get used stuff from me. "Eh, give or take, yeah."

My children will get their own toys and clothes as they grow up.

Nuzlocke and You: Johto and my empty Pokéheart

My first death in this run (Yeah, THIS run, #12 in HeartGold alone.) was my Raticate. Ecruteak City's Gym decided to not hold back. A Mean Look and Curse took her, my lovely... Oh, wow. I can't even remember her name. Did she matter that much to me?

My next two deaths were my Dratini "Desy"(Casino, a long time to win) and my Golbat "Seras"(I almost had her completely happy). Morty's Gengar took them quickly with Shadow Ball. I wasn't ready. I wasn't prepared. My highest was Seras at Lvl.22, and his Lvl.25 Gengar was much faster. My Croconaw, "Killer", took it on and won by mere health points. So now... I don't know. Three in one place, that's a big deal.

Jean. That was her name. I named her after an old friend. Yeah, she was a Lvl.3 Ratata when I found her, but she almost killed my starter. I named her Jean because the real one always kicked my ass all the time. And now, I feel really hurt. The real life Jean is fine, thankfully. But what if this was the real Jean? I could have saved her, had I just payed attention.

So now, we move on. I will look for more to help me in my quest. I need something to cheer me up. Oh look, my chubby baby boy! Yay!

IRL EXP: I Hit a Deer and It Was 'K.

Exhaustion takes it's toll on people in different ways. Many feel sluggish and worn down. Others feel like they just hit "E" on their energy and need to rest there and now. Me? A cop could have pulled me over, gave me a breathalyzer and hesitantly let me go; I was riding those last bits of energy and bouncing off the walls.

My daughter had just finished her first dance recital (I'm so proud... *sniff*) and I had to pack up. Just because everyone else goes home didn't mean I could. So after an additional twenty minutes, everything is ready to go; dancing equipment, dance floor, and my dancing coworkers.

But just because I'm buzzing like a bee doesn't mean I'm not paying attention. Not even five miles from the recital, a doe (A deer, a Female deer.) decides to walk onto the road. I see this deer and slow down. I mean, she's a good 40 or so feet away. I see the vehicle behind me is at a safe distance. I look at my dashboard and we're at 30 mph. She's still walking in front of me. Don't you see the really bright lights coming at you? Look to your right, you ridiculous hunk of meat! LOOK RIGHT!

At ten miles per hour, I slap a deer with the front of my 2007 Chrysler SUV. I watched in awe as the doe rolled over, stood back up, and limped quickly into the bushes. Well, time to call the police.

Weird thing here. I had thought that if you hit a deer, the call center send an officer to you for a report. Turns out I may be wrong or gullible. The lady on the other end said the nearest officer was thirty minutes away. If I wished and if there was no damage, I could just not file a report. You know, despite the fact that I may have just doomed a living creature to a slow, painful death.

Taking a look at the front of my vehicle, all I had was hair. Deer fur everywhere. No blood, no cracks, no dents. So I took the nice lady's advice and drove home.

Now thinking about it, I should have just sat there and waited. I feel a little guilty for not doing so, especially since I'm, like, Lawful Stupid at most points of my life. Chances are my insurance company is fine with my decision, since they really don't like me right now. Or ever. But those events are different stories for a different time.

IRL EXP: Increased Difficulty

Babies are hard work. (HA HA, of course they are, let's laugh at the n00b and point for a bit) I'm a bit out of shape on the whole "New Dad" thing. I have two girls already, so how hard can three kids be?

I forgot the fact that my daughters are nearly self-sufficient and don't need Daddy 24/7. (Nope, just once every two hours.) My son, Emerson (late announcement: I HAVE A SON NOW) is dependent on us for EVERYTHING. Eating, moving, breathing, hugs, everything. And I feel pretty awful for forgetting it.

For those who need that gaming analogy to understand (or for those who read this blog just for those analogies), here we go.

You're really good at your game of choice. Excellent doesn't cover your ability. You were made for this game. And now the developers have released a new difficulty for additional play-throughs. So you try it out for a "decent challenge" for once. You start up the game, and the items carry over from your last game. First enemy of the game, and you're ready for whatever this game will thro- GAME OVER.

Whoa, rewind. What just happened? You played this part before. Granted, a long time ago, but this party's a cake walk. Okay, restart, go in slowly and WHAT IS THIS FREAK DOING HERE? This thing is in the final levels. Why, in the name of chocolate bunnies (SEE WHAT I DID THERE? Easter tie-in.), is this level 50 nightmare walking with this level 0 minion? So now that you know the game is evil, you do what everyone else does: search the Internet for a walkthrough.

"Patch 3.1.034: This is the update that introduces Hard-Core mode! You will be allowed to restart the game, carrying everything over from your last save. However, this mode also carries over all obstacles, enemies and bosses as well. In order to keep you on your toes, enemies will spawn randomly over the course of the game, in addition to regularly encountered enemies and bosses. Also, Herobrine has been removed."

WELL. That would be a horrible game mode indeed. Not as bad as Dark Souls, but pretty bad. That would be like how I feel right now. I was expecting something totally different and now have to level grind all over while dealing with monstrosities that will OHKO me, given the chance. Do I deal with it? Yes. Do I like it? Well, yes. I'm a bit masochistic like that. That's kinda why I'm a gamer in the first place.

The challenge is there, and like a bad rage face comic, I ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE. Life is hard, and hard games remind me to not give in when life throws me curve balls like this. Emerson is my son, and I will help raise him while raising Ellie and Autumn at the same time. It is my responsibility as a good parent to do so, and I plan on being a Great Parent. (I wanna be, the very best...)

P.S. If anyone knows a game like the one I described earlier, give me a shout. I like hard games.

Gaming Update: Three's a PINKY PIE PARTY!

Did you know that there is a Back to the Future game? Oh, yeah, that NES one; I forgot. Well, did you know that they made a better one? And it's by the gang behind the Walking Dead game? If you did, just play along for the rest of the Internet.

Set right after Movie #3, Marty McFly must find out what happened to Doc Brown. Doc sent back Einstein the dog in the delorian (which I remember that thing becoming scrap metal after #3, so enter PLOT HOLES) and Marty receives a call for help on a tape recorder. The game already has multiple references to the movie series, so I already want to keep playing. But there are other games, so I gotta make like a tree and GET OUTTA HERE.

Go ahead and face palm. If you remember, you'll get a laugh. If you don't know what happened, you need to watch the series.

And speaking of a series, I have been playing the Dance Central series lately. Even got a pal who wants to achievement hunt with me. (SHOUT OUT TO MR. L!) If you think that you're fit, then you go a couple rounds on this and then talk to me. Even just half-A--ing it, the game will work you till you drop. Most of the songs are more adult-themed songs, and the DLC songs are ridiculously priced, but hey- I like the game, so I'll dance like a monkey for a few more bucks.

Besides, the games has a cool feature that wasn't advertised: I will load up a currently popular song for some kids that think "SWAG" and "YOLO" are desirable traits. The moment they try to show off their "SWAG" on, say, "Soulja Boy", all that "SWAG" can't save them and I get real dancers on the floor. I don't care if my biggest customers are 8 years old. They can bust some moves.

The last game I have for you kinda breaks my norm so far. Phase 10, a card game in which you need to acquire a certain set of cards 10 times before your opponents. It's like a harder version of Rummy. My wife and I try to get one game in before bed. We've gotten to the point where we breeze through the game in minutes. We still enjoy each others company, just like an old married couple should. "SKIP!" "F--- you, B---h." "Bite me, W---e. OW!" Don't worry, we'd rather fight over cards than anything else.

In case you were still waiting for the next chapters in my Dead Space play-through.... I finally discovered true fear. More on that around Wednesday.

IRL EXP: Third's a Charm or Three Strikes?

OOOOOHHHHHH MY BABY IS COMING AND NO I MEAN MY WIFE IS HAVING A BABY I MEAN NOW YEAH NOW HE'S COMING THROUGH HE WANTS OUT BUT IT'S TOO EARLY SO WHAT NOW WHAT NOW SOMEBODY STOP ME
*Slap*

Thank you, random Web Surfer. Let us backtrack a bit. My wife is due April 22, and this will be our third child yet first son. Emerson David Sagataw, he shall be called, and he may be called that really early. Nicole has been feeling odd pains all day. I, being the good husband (and the ever worrier), suggested that Nicole should check it out. After all, her mucus plug (real thing, eww) fell out a few days ago. That means baby wants out pretty soon. Nicole, being the loving wife that she is, then told me to shut up- everything is fine and that I should make her a sandwich.

Fast Forward about four hours. Nicole really is in pain, and I need to go to work. I'm literally in front on my workplace's front door. She asks that I come home with her to help her with the girls, but still refuses to see the doctor or even call him. I walk inside to tell my coworkers that I cannot come in today, as odd as that sounds.

Jump another four hours and we're right around here. Nicole is in Pain. We drive up to DCH with our twin terrors sleeping soundly. She insists that, even though she NOW thinks that there may be an issue, that she can take care of herself and I wait patiently for her. Even now, I wait for a call or text message stating that there will be or will not be a baby coming tonight. Can you tell that I'm handling this well?

If this were a video game, I may have restarted a couple times. Just to make sure I got the right outcome. You see, I don't like this at all. I have to wait and see if other people do the right thing. Not fellow teammates or NPCs, but other people in general. It's as nerve-racking as gambling; I don't know the odds and wouldn't benefit if I did. My part has ended and now I have to wait for player 95 to take their turn with my campaign. I don't like it. That's my wife. That's my son.

Uh, wait one. Okay, the official word is that my wife is having real contractions, but it is not full labor and she is not dilated. Doctor "I have an online degree" said she can leave, so while I'm happy she and baby are okay, I don't like that player 95 decided to go AFK. The ball is back in my court, however, and now I can take a more active role in keeping my family safe. Now, if only I had a sure fire way to keep Emerson inside for a while longer.

IRL EXP + FAIL: Dead Space and the F-Bomb

Let me see a quick show of hands: Who has played Dead Space? To those with their hands still in the air: Who were scared to the point where you HAD to walk away?

If you didn't get scared, you're either a liar or a psychopath. If you raised your hand, you're just silly. This is the Internet; I can't see you. But thanks for playing along.

Dead Space 3 just came out, and I figured that I'd start over from the first game and just play my way through. Luckily, there was a sale for the PS3 recently. I can now play with ALL OF THESE DOWNLOADED items, but that's no fun. It is not a true test of my skill as a gamer. It would be like playing DOOM 1 for the first time with God Mode on. No, I want to remember what made Dead Space so good in the first place.

And right away, I begin to remember. I even learn a few things. New thing #1: If you leave the game for a bit, it will go into a demo mode, where it sings "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star", and flashes scenes of your character dying graphically. Haven't even started playing, and I'm creeped out. Sweet.





WARNING: SPOILERS







OKAY. So, chapter one. I walk in and start hoarding immediately. I grab some person's money that they left and no one cares. Hey, a Med Pack! Grab that too, LoL. Walk behind a glass wall and watch people die- OH F--- That escalated quickly. And Red Shirt Two is dead. Alas, poor dead guy; I hardly knew you. Parting is such sweet- WHERE'S THE BAD GUY!? OH F--- He's after me run run run run and SAFE! No, no, yes, YES. HA. Punk. And now I have a gun. Oh yeah, that's right, I'm bad, you know it. Let me just shoot the door and rescue this guy who is now dead. Okay, whatever. I have a gun, so I'll just hunt you down. That's right, run away. Got you now, ya little- HELLO. F--- I just got ambushed. Fine, I ain't even mad. Well played.

Just replaced a shuttle, and now I'm going to walk through this pile of dead things I killed earlier- F--- YOU you sneaky bastards. I forgot that dead bodies disappear in the game due to RAM constraints, ambiance and the story. Fine, you little F---ers, you wanna play that game? Fine. FINE. Just let me get into my ship and F--- I'M ON FIRE. Give me a F---ing break! This game is half scaring me, and half PISSING ME OFF. Now I need to find a dead guy in the medical bay.... F---.

Chapter two, a crazy lady gives me my kinesis unit then dies. Whatever. I half-remember the baby Necromorphs, so you don't bother me. Oh hey! Space! And I have air, cool. Jump around, jump around, shoot the Necros crawling around. New Thing #2: No one can hear you scream F--- as a Necromorph just walks up on you. Actual science in a video game; who would have guessed? And now the baby- F--- YOU. JUST F--- YOU. I DID NOT THINK THOSE F---ERS COULD CLIMB AND SHOOT S---. SO F--- YOU AND YOUR F---ING Thermite.... Fine, but I'm still angry. And I died to some weird acid spewing slinky Necromorphs. And again. Mass slow and bang bang bang. So, let's blow s--- up! Huh. Disappointing. Giant creepy hole in the hall, kite that f---er with my weapon at the ready.... And that is how Necromorphs are made! Eww. Oh, F---, he's coming for me DIE MOTHERF---ER, DIE! QUIT MAKING MORE, DAMNIT! ARRRRGGGHHH! And I have to go back to the big hole f---you f---you f---you and made it. I want a new gun.

So yeah. I remember Dead Space now. Just starting Chapter three and I'm not very happy. I still think it's a great game, just very infuriating. Stay tuned for more of my thrilling experience in the game F--- YOU I JUST STARTED THIS DAMN LEVEL GO AWAY

Okay

I like Rammus. This guy was the second champion I've ever played. (Sona was first) He's like a tiny little tank of "F You, I do what I want". Want to shoot him in the face? Nope, hit W to kill Miss Fortune in the middle of her Ult. Karthus is chanting? Hit E to stop him and save team. Tristana is getting away? Q around minions and get the kill. My favorite part is that his Ult can hit towers. Now with season 3, all I need is teleport, Omhwrecker, and a Warmog's; now I can eat towers in seconds.

So now, I have to wonder, just what else can he do? Maybe I could go At-Mog's with him. Perhaps put on some attack speed and freak people out. Maybe even go AP with him. Imagine what his Q could do with it's flat +1 AP ratio and a Deathcap. It's a Troll build, definitely, but it would be fun to see if it works. I mean, I just ran a Support Rammus for Ezreal and we destroyed bottom lane. So a Liandry's would work perfectly in that role, taking out 10% health with every Successful Q. Quickly E the target and wait for Ez to kill it; boom, dead enemy, next please.

While this is all fun to speculate, I really won't try any of this outside of bots until: (A) I know that it works REALLY well, and (B) Free Ezreal/Talon week is over. I mean, you guys are really squishy. When I leave the lane to re-up health and mana, you should come with. Seriously. Oh, new match! Rammus, I choose you!

IRL FAIL: Music Theory

Nicole: "So, why can't you keep up a conversation with me?"

Well, I'm concentrating on doing the dishes while you walk around the house cleaning randomly. At the same time, we have noise from the other apartments and your music playing, adding to my concentration difficulties of talking to you.

"Can't you just tune out to the music, like me?"

Well, no, not really. I really don't like this type of music. I usually like rock.

"How could you tune out with your music? I really don't like your nerdy music at all. Even the rock music gives me a headache."

Think of it this way. You like your music because you're familiar with it. Such as this current song; I don't know who sings it, but I can tell that it sounds like a random 'I love my man' song by a random teen to twenty-something female singer. That kind of song is one you are comfortable with, so you can just tune out with it and work to the beat. I, however, am not accustomed to it, so I cannot tune it out. I listen to the song because it stands out to me.

"What?"

Try it this way. Let's say you listen to Victorian music and I listen to Tribal music. You could not stand my music because it's so different. I could not stand your music as well, yet we each love our own music because we are used to it. Tracking?

"I'm sorry, I wasn't listening. :)"

WHA-BUTI-IJUST..... BDKVHE,FHWNCIJGBSIZJCMGUR

Dear Game Freak:

I have an idea to end all ideas. This one will blow your mind. Take your next Pokémon game for the new WiiU and make it like my idea. In return, I want a copy and 0.05% of all the profits associated with the game.

For your next game, make it an actual training simulation of Pokémon. Like a virtual pet, but Pokémon, and better. Repeat an attack on this dummy to improve accuracy and speed. Run through simulations with other Pokémon. Have this Pokémon learn, actually learn how to fight. Then engage in online battles in a 3D environment with other people's Pokémon. It would be like the anime, but more engaging. "Fury Swipes has bad accuracy, so I trained my Pokémon to zig-zag to take advantage of it!" "RHYPERIOR, SANDSTORM AND DIG!" And all this would happen in real-time, combining your command speed with that of your Pokémon's speed. Instant reaction from a Whisicott and a two-second drag for the same move done by a Ferrothorn.

Limited trainer customization. What you have done so far is great. Stay with that. I don't wish to see rude and disturbing trainer's cards depicting phallic symbols.

Structured tournaments online using Smogon rules. I won't come back to a Hoenh region match if all I see are the Regi team rocking unsuspecting players.

Write a story using all the regions. Restart and use the region's Pokémon in all official battles, such as gym battles, the Elite Four, and any Pokémon-theme side game of the region. Sure, Team Plasma just got rocked by your Level 100 Charizard, but your Infurnape now has no EVs and is easy pickings for the Fighting gym. Trainers won't pay out unless it's a region-based Pokémon. You can think of something, I don't need to do all the work for you.

So again, I hope that you will take what I have typed into consider- OMG GEN SIX IS OUT MUST HAVE 3DS